#127 BURIED NEARBY BUT APART
MARGARET O'DWYER/TALTY
O'Dwyer or Talty? I am still uncertain about Margaret's birthname. On all records (her daughters' names and vital records, her own death record) she goes by Talty; but on her marriage license, I found her as O'Dwyer.
Margaret’s early years are unclear. She was born in Ireland
about 1883. She immigrated to the US in 1902 and in 1904 and 1905 gave birth to
two daughters, Helen and Florence. The girls went by the surname of Talty as
did Margaret. I suspect these might have been uncertain times for Margaret.
But life changed for the better when, in 1909, Margaret married Thomas Bidwell, a Buffalo cabinet maker. She was 26, he was 28.
On their 1909 marriage license, Margaret’s legal surname is “O’Dwyer”, which is why her use
of “Talty” is curious. On the other hand, her 1950 death certificate lists a Patrick
Talty as her father but this information was given by her daughter so may not be the most reliable.
In any case, Thomas “adopted’ Margaret’s two daughters, who
took the Bidwell name. Two sons were born.
In 1911, the family
moved to Elora, Ontario where Thomas worked as a cabinet maker. Elora was a
significant furniture-making centre from the late 19th century into the early
20th century.
It is quite possible that Thomas worked for the J.C. Mundell Company. His two step-daughters were employed as chair fitters—perhaps at the same company. Mundell’s specialized in the manufacture of household and commercial wooden furniture, with particular emphasis on chairs, dining and parlour furniture, bedsteads, sideboards, wardrobes, dressers, and office or institutional furnishings. The company produced both solid-wood and veneered pieces, often in popular late-Victorian and early-20th-century styles and issued illustrated furniture catalogues for regional and national distribution. Mundell manufactured large quantities of chairs, which required skilled chair makers; also needed were cabinet workers who could join, carve, finish, and polish and upholster. This factory was a major employer in Elora. (Around 1910, Mundell’s was Elora’s largest employers with a payroll in the hundreds.)
Margaret and Thomas had five more children over the next decade. Thomas
was Anglican but Margaret and all the children were raised Catholic.
By 1931, some of the family were living in Ingersoll,
Ontario where Thomas worked as a cabinet maker in a furniture factory.
They moved back to Elora. Margaret died there March 22, 1950, aged 63; Thomas
died in 1954, aged 73.
Margaret and Thomas were married for more than forty years and raised nine children. What is notable, however, is their final resting places. Both are buried in Elora, but Margaret, along with two of their children, lies in the Elora Catholic Cemetery, while Thomas is buried in the Elora Municipal Cemetery; the two cemeteries adjoin one another. Significantly, each tombstone acknowledges their marriage.
This arrangement fits well with how mixed-faith marriages were lived in Ontario in the early twentieth century. It does not imply estrangement or marital unhappiness, but rather reflects the religious and emotional considerations that often led a Catholic wife and a Protestant husband to choose separate cemeteries while still openly affirming their union in death. Although husband and wife rest in different Elora cemeteries, this follows period burial practice: Catholic faithful were normally buried in consecrated Catholic ground, while Protestants were interred in the municipal or “union” cemetery or in family plots.
For women who remained practising Catholics, burial in consecrated Catholic ground was especially important. Church clergy exercised strong moral authority, particularly over women’s religious obligations. Catholic doctrine strongly encouraged burial in Catholic-consecrated soil, as it expressed belief in the Communion of Saints and a shared faith in life and death. Burial in a municipal cemetery could be spiritually troubling and, in some circumstances, might result in the denial of church rites. If a Catholic was buried outside consecrated ground, a priest was required to bless the burial space and provide pastoral care. In addition, Catholic cemeteries often required that those interred be in good standing with the Church, or at least baptized Catholics.
The couple's burial decision, therefore, concerned Margaret’s faith rather than her marriage. Mixed-faith marriages were permitted but carefully regulated; burial was one of the few areas where compromise was difficult. Margaret likely felt a deep responsibility to be “properly” buried, even if this meant separation from her husband in death. The choice was framed in terms of obedience and spiritual security rather than personal preference.
The reverse was also true for Thomas. A Protestant husband would not typically be buried in a Catholic cemetery, both for doctrinal reasons and because Catholic cemeteries often restricted burial to Catholics. Even when permitted, many Protestants were uncomfortable with burial in Catholic ground. Separation in death was therefore often mutual and expected, rather than contentious. Thomas died four years after Margaret, and the burial decision was ultimately his own.
The fact that each spouse is named on the other’s monument underscores a marriage marked by mutual respect and enduring affection, even as each honoured their own faith in death.
Comments
Post a Comment